I 1 Feeling: False

Empathetic Response: It sounds like he was really making you feel false; I know that can be very frustrating—especially when you’re being honest…it’s just not what they want to hear.

2 Feeling: Infuriated

Empathetic Response: You certainly have a right to infuriated: those things were very important to you.

3 Feeling: Anxious

Empathetic Response: It’s okay to be anxious: a lot of people feel that about a move—will the next be place be as nice as my last?

4 Feeling: Punished

Empathetic Response: Yes, it is almost as if you are being punished for his faults. What we have to remember, however, is that—at this point—we are not thinking about fairness but rather about safety. We’ll get to fairness, but first things first.

II

1 Feeling: Contrite

Empathetic Response: Clearly you’re contrite about mistakes made in the past…

2 Feeling: Distressed

Empathetic Response: Your ordeal has distressed you, that’s very normal…

3 Feeling: Bitter

Empathetic Response: Yes, he did do that, and it is important to remember, but it is also important to keep our lives from becoming bitter.

4 Feeling: Shocked

Empathetic Response: Your shock is very natural—it is a great surprise, but it also has its great joys.

III

1 Feeling: Afraid

Empathetic Response: What he has done would make anyone afraid.

2 Feeling: Outraged

Empathetic Response: Their treatment of him was deplorable and your outrage shows that you care.

3 Feeling: Ecstatic

Empathetic Response: Your accomplishment is indeed something to be ecstatic about—now let’s buckle down and keep it rolling.

4 Feeling: Bleak

I wonder why the teacher gave the other student the tutor and not you?
V

1 Feeling: Mixed up

Empathetic Response: It is a situation that would make anyone mixed up: one person you trust telling you one thing, and others telling you another. Both have your best interests in mind yet see two very different ways to get to the goal that everyone wants. So what do you think would be best?

2 Feeling: Content

Empathetic Response: It’s good to know that kind of contentment: it lets us really appreciate life and those around us a lot more than if we never experience it, don’t you think? Then it shows us how we can turn around and show that same kind of love to others.

3 Feeling: Confounded

Empathetic Response: You’re right, it is fair that such a short statement can feel confounding. I should have explained in more detail to show what I meant.

4 Feeling: Shaky…